“A Shelter for Us, by Us” Ruth’s House and the Work of Anti-Racism and Decolonization in Family Crisis Support

Ruth’s House is a safe haven shaped by values of compassion and integrity, and a deep understanding of the African immigrant experience. Founded by Dee Adekugbe, lovingly called Mama D by many in the community, Ruth’s House is more than a shelter. It’s a space of healing, belonging, and empowerment rooted in Afrocentric values and a vision of justice.

Building Ruth’s House: A Response to Community Need

“What inspired me to start Ruth’s House,” Dee shares, “was the number of families in the community that were reaching out to me, asking for help… just wanting to be able to offer them the support that they needed from a cultural perspective. And making sure that as a community we can take care of our own.”

What began as one woman answering a call from her community has since grown into the first ethnocultural emergency shelter in Western Canada focused on the African community. And with that milestone came even greater responsibility and expansion. “We realized the need for support for men. And so we took a leap of faith and opened Mandela House,” Dee says. “It’s the first of its kind in Western Canada, providing shelter and support to men who have experienced abuse.”

Ruth’s House has evolved to serve the entire family, recognizing that healing and support must extend beyond one person, it must ripple through the community. Ensuring that no one is left behind.

Family. Faith. Community.

At the core of Ruth’s House are three pillars: family, faith, and community. These values are deeply embedded in the Afrocentric approach the organization takes when working with clients.

“So many people are new immigrants. They don’t have family here, which is a contributing factor to the family violence,” Dee explains. “We offer them a family. Everybody calls me Mama D. I’m everybody’s mom, everybody’s grandma, everybody’s next of kin.”

And faith? It’s foundational. “As Africans, faith is the foundation of everything we do whether you’re Christian, Muslim, or traditionalist. We offer that spiritual support because it’s what our people need to heal.”

Community, the third pillar, reinforces this interconnectedness. “We come from a communal culture. In Africa, if you’re getting married, it’s not just your wedding, it’s the whole community’s. But here, everyone is isolated. Ruth’s House brings back that sense of collective care.”

Confronting Systemic Racism

One of the most powerful parts of our conversation with Dee was her critique of systemic racism in social services. Her voice doesn’t waver when she discusses the racism clients face in mainstream shelters and healthcare systems.

Dee reflected on how trauma is often dismissed because it doesn’t look like what the system expects.

“Just because I’m not screaming and shouting doesn’t mean I’m not in pain. And as Black people, when we bruise, it’s harder to see. I’ve seen clients trying to prove they’re hurt, and someone says, ‘Where’s the bruise?’”

This lack of understanding, she says, leads to misdiagnoses, mistrust, and missed opportunities to provide help. “Shelters and programs were not designed for immigrants. And they definitely weren’t designed for us,” she emphasized.

From Awareness to Action and Advocacy

So how does Ruth’s House respond to all this?

By refusing to replicate the same harmful structures that fail African communities. Every staff member at Ruth’s House is part of the community. Every service is designed with culture and tradition in mind.

“Our clients don’t have to explain everything three times. We already understand 75% of the issues. We just need to hear your experience,” Dee explained.

Whether it’s through their Sisterhood program for women, youth-led initiatives for children, or their culturally grounded support for men.

“We are breaking down barriers just by existing,” Dee said. “We’re advocating for policy change. We’re showing people that this is what it means to support African families from a place of respect, culture, and community.”

By creating spaces where people are heard and seen in their full cultural context, Ruth’s House is dismantling the one-size-fits-all model of care that has long excluded immigrants and BIPOC.

A Vision of Just Futures

Dee’s work with Ruth’s House is a powerful reminder of how community-rooted, culturally grounded care can serve as a form of resistance, resistance to erasure, to systemic barriers, and to the one-size-fits-all approach of mainstream systems.

“We are addressing family violence and the systemic and structural racism that is in place in society just by existing,” she says.

Ruth’s House offers not only a story of survival but of reclamation of culture, of safety, and of healing.

For more information or to support the work of Ruth’s House, visit their website: Get Involved | Ruth's House Society

Written by: Bolade Afolabi